….Because the “Real” ones are exhausted and would like to sit down!!!
Whew! Being a Mommy is the most exhilarating and exhausting job I have ever had in my life!
I love being a mom to my three boys, but I often find myself down and frustrated that I am not perfect and that my children are not always perfectly mannered and obedient (Especially in Public!).
Some days, I look around and it seems as if everyone else around me is doing just perfect. (My boys are the only ones eating dirt, wrestling on the ground and screaming at the top of their lungs, while running in circles) In fact, sometimes it seems as if all the other Mommies have it so together that they have time to correct me and give long and well-meaning advice on how I can be “perfect” like them. (They speak as if life is all “Peaches & Cream” and “Unicorns & Butterflies” with children)
Recently, I have spoken with a few other mommies who feel as I do. Questioning their skills as a mommy, wondering if they should listen to all the crazy advice, and feeling as if they were the only ones with a child (or children) that just wasn’t conforming to the standard set by those around them. (Are you one of those frustrated mommies? YOU ARE NOT ALONE!)
Here is what I told them, and what I have to tell myself! God made ME (Just Me) the Mommy to my boys! He knew exactly the personalities and energy my boys would have. He knew my capabilities and capacities…and he chose me to raise them! God doesn’t expect me to be perfect!!!! (Thank goodness! Because, Lord knows I never will be perfect!) What God does expect me to do is to love my babies like He loves me!
What do I mean by, Love my babies, like God loves me?
When I realize my boys are struggling in an area (Or several areas), I need to stop, truly see why they are struggling, look for the root of the issue, and lovingly help them or discipline them to realize what they need to do differently. This process can at times take a lot of time and patience. But Patience is not always a strong point for sleep-deprived mommies.
Case in point, yesterday, I realized that I was as cranky as my two year who desperately needed a nap! So, I laid down and took one too! And although at first I felt guilty that I was “wasting” the precious naptime hour where the opportunity to accomplish 4x as much with no children un-doing what I have just done, I had to realistically come to the realization it wasn’t worth it. After a little rest, I was motivated, happy, patient, and had so much more clarity!
Don’t be ashamed that your children act like children. Don’t discipline them for just Being Children. Let’s get down on the floor, turn off the electronics, let the laundry sit in a basket a little longer, leave the dishes soaking in the sink, and spend some time getting to know the needs of our children and patiently help them grow. I am thankful for a God that patiently works with me, correcting and guiding me with realistic expectations. He pushes me where he knows I need to be pushed and helps me when I need help. Let’s do the same for our children.
So, to all the “Real” mommies out there…who have a five year old bursting with out of control energy, a two year old that is grumpy, and a one year old who communicates by screaming and roaring like a dinosaur (ok…maybe this is just me!), Keep your chin up! Get some rest, get some advice from someone you trust, don’t feel like you are alone…
All of us as moms have our low moments. But remember the high ones! The times where you just could burst with love & joy & pride! Keep at it! Don’t give up. You will get through this “phase” (even if only to get into the next “phase”!)
I think this post was just as much to encourage myself as it is to hopefully encourage you!
Praying for our children today… And especially all you Mommies! You are Super Women!
Blessings,
Keikilani
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